I had been struggling with the ideas attached to writing. With each paragraph I tried editing, the weight of the outcome poured harder and harder against me. My confidence shook.
I wrote this poem to help me gain perspective and reevaluate how things are going.
I AM NEXT!!
There is a part of me still fighting,
Even when I know the truth.
Here I am scared of simply writing,
Ignoring the passions of my youth.
It’s as if the knowledge compounds
All the fears and dread of rejection.
My ears relate the softly spoken sounds
Rebounding in my mind an internal reflection.
Do I now lack the strength I had?
Is my confidence at an all time low?
I read my prose and assume that it’s all bad,
My confidence fades like shining a light toward a shadow.
But I’m not weak, it is a trick of my mind,
I make mistakes and hold the weight like a brick.
The failures push me onto a brink, but I find
It’s not the end of the road or ramblings of a lunatic.
With each blow of the fist thrown my way
I am hurt, yet I am still on my feet.
My dreams aren’t over this is but a short delay,
I will taste victory and it will be ever so sweet.
I speak to you though directed to myself,
You must persevere and bring your thoughts to text.
One day your book will be on the shelf,
And a new author will see it and say ‘I am next.’